I wonder if we were the ones Jesus asked, “do you love me?” how we would respond. We often think of love in sentimental terms, as feelings and inclinations. The Greatest Commandment, however, is an imperative to close the gap between our vague aspirations and the material reality of how we lives our lives; to bind the heart, mind, and body to our soul. I think here is is especially important we remember that Jesus does not ask us questions like this to bring us shame, but rather, to come to terms with this gap.
Love is an action. When I move towards my beloved, I have to attune my attention to her needs and desires. Rather than spraying loving gestures into the wind willy-nilly, I must learn - what can I do to love my beloved as she actually is, not the illusion I have built in my heart and mind? Sentimentality refuses to take an honest assessment of our actions, and it gives little heed to to desires of the object of our love.